It’s been an interesting morning here, and I’ve been so riled up for the last hour that I’ve got to get some of this out of my head so I can concentrate.  I won’t get into details of what has been going on, but needless to say that the events have led me to really think about what it is to be alive, be a man, and the roles that we all play in our socitey.  I’m not going to pretend that I have the answers to the meaning of life.  Or even that I have ALL the answers.  But I DO know some things for fact.

A man is defined by his actions.   Not that his words don’t have an impact, but his actions are what determine who he is is and what others think of him.  I remember when I was in college, I think it was my third or fourth year, I was taking an advanced journalism class.  Our assignment was to write what we would like our eulogy to say when it was read at our funeral.  Being what…20, 21….I had no idea at the time.  If I had that same assignment today, I think the best that I could hope for would be that I was remembered as fair, honest, hardworking, loving, a good role model, a good father and husband, and that I genuinely CARED for the people in my life.  I think in today’s society, if you look past the misnomer that we are all “connected” on a global scale, the TRUTH is that we are growing further and further apart from what it means to be a part of a society.  Becoming much more insular and self-involved.

A mans existence, happiness and self-worth are measured by his family and friends, and his nature and disposition are shaped in part, by what others think of him.  There are qualities that seem to have been forgotten in the shuffle of this fast-paced, COMPETITIVE, life we lead.  Respect, understanding, sympathy, truth, and HONOR to name just a few.  A man should be able to look at his life and find examples of all those qualities in his actions.  Sadly there are far too many people who can’t look at themselves in relation to others and find many of those qualities.  We are not above mistakes, we are not above lapses in judgement, and we all hurt those we love and care for from time to time.  But does your life have true harmony?  Do your good deeds and actions outweigh the bad?  Those are some important questions, and if you answered no to them….then it’s MY suggestion that maybe you need to spend less time being “connected” to the world, and more time searching within yourself for some of those qualities that have been neglected in your life.  Have I made mistakes or decisions that I regret in my life?  Yeah, I have.  I can’t change any of them either.  No one can.  But you can and should learn from them, and move on with your life.

There are too many conflicting personalities in the world for us ALL to get along.  It’s not going to happen.  Very few people have the patience and understanding to see things from a different perspective and be accepting of that.  A person may not agree with me. I may not agree with someone else.  There’s nothing wrong with having a difference of opinion.  What IS wrong is when someone uses that difference of opinion and their words or actions to bring harm to another person or group of people.  You are entitled to an opinion, to a belief and a position.  You are not entitled to harm someone else through your words or actions.  All of your actions have consequences, both good and bad.  It’s up to you to decide if the good that comes from an action is worth the price of the negative consequences that it may have.

I draw the line with people, and I have no more time for them or their words when they begin to show me with their actions just how self-absorbed they are, and how little they care about who they hurt by what they say or the actions they take.  Going to church on Sunday doesn’t do you any good if you’re a complete ass the rest of the week.  Showing your kids that you don’t care about what happens to other people so long as things are done YOUR way, doesn’t help them to become more independant and strong, it turns them into miniature versions of the same kind of bullying ass that you’re presenting to the rest of the world.

Sadly, not everyone knows how to react to these people.  The question that has been bothering me all morning, is that if someone cannot or doesn’t want to or know HOW to stand up to these types of individuals, is it MY place to defend them?   In MANY ways, my answer to this is yes.  There are few of us that have that sense of honor, virtue, and the willingness for justice and fairness to prevail.  It is not always through a lack of introspection that people lack these qualities, much of it revolves around having the courage to stand up for what you believe in, to not be intimidated in the face of adversity or dissent.  As I’ve gotten older, I can’t help but wonder if I haven’t missed my calling by being born a thousand years too late.  ugh.  It’s time to get back to work for me and try not to dwell on the ethical decay of the world any more.