Snow Various-shades-of-grey and the Seven persons of diminutive
stature. Part Six.

The Seven persons of diminutive stature, The-Ruler-In-line-For-The-Throne-formerly-known-as-
Prince, and Bert all rushed upstairs to the bedroom. On the floor in a big heap lay Snow Variousshades-of-grey rubbing her head and mumbling under her breath.

"Snow! Yer awake." cried the group.
"Yes but I've got a lousy headache." She replied.
"I know a good cure for headaches." Prince said.
"Really? Hang on. Who is he?" She said pointing to Prince.
"It's a long story," said Grumpy, "about six parts long so far. And I'd avoid any cures of his if I was you."
"How did I get in here? The last thing I remember is buying a copy of The Big Issue..."
"Bless you." said Bert.
"Thank you." said Snow. "Hang on, who's he?"
"That's Bert. You were saying?"
"Oh...erm, as I said I bought a copy of The Big Issue and..."
"Bless you." said Sneezy.
"Thank you. I bought it from this past retirement age lady of no fixed abode."
"What did she look like?" Doc asked, "Anything like this?" He held up a mask that he had found outside.
"Yes that's her. But, Oh my god you've ripped her face off!" And with that she threw up.
"Now look what you've done. That stain'll never come out."
"'S easy innit. We's lookin' fer a senior female wiv no face. Shouldn't be too difficult to find." said Dozy.

Grumpy cursed the fact that he hadn't brought the shovel upstairs with him.

"Gotta be Elvira, Snows stepmom." deduced Grumpy.
"But why is she trying to kill me?" asked Snow mopping up the mess on the floor.
"Reckon she's jealous of ya. It's an old story." said Grumpy.
"Much like this one." whispered Mick.
"What am I going to do?"
"Only one thing we can do." said Grumpy. "Prince, know any cures for being evil or just very
misunderstood?"
"As a matter of fact I...er no I don't actually. I don't suppose that she has a headache has she?"

Miles away in the castle was a dark staircase. The dark staircase spiralled down into the depths beneath the old dungeons which were no longer used as it was now far more sensible to rehabilitate criminals back into society and allow them to take holidays on tax payers money. Obviously if you give a criminal plenty of money then they have no need to commit crimes and everybody is safe and cosy. At the bottom of the stair case was a dark room filled with all sorts of spell books (such as "My first book of ABC" and "The Oxford English Dictionary"), and chemistry equipment. Hung on a far wall, just in front of Elvira was a mirror of comfortable proportions.

"Mirror, Mirror on the wall," said Elvira, "who's the fairest of them all?"
"Erm..." said the mirror.
"Come on I haven't got all day. It's a simple question."
"Well if you're so flamin' clever what're you askin' me for?" answered the mirror.
"Don't get smart with me youthful male." said Elvira with a stern look on her face.
"Okay if you're going to be like that, then I'll say Snow Various-shades-of-grey."
"Wrong answer bozo. Snows dead."
"Wrong answer smart arse. Snows alive." retorted the mirror.

To be continued...

In part seven:
Are all mirrors so clever?
Are the seven persons of diminutive stature going to find a way to stop Elvira?
Are is the eighteenth letter of the alphabet!
Are you getting fed up with this yet?
Are the jokes getting worse?
AARRRChooooo!
Get out of it Sneezy you're not supposed to be here.